(no subject)

[chester-kat.livejournal.com]

Fellow anti-gwens!

I need your help. I am writing a story where Gwen, Tosh and Owen are all turned into inanimate objects (why yes it is a shameless rip off of Beauty and the Beast - why do you ask? *does an impression of Gwen's innocent googly eyes stare*) but i don't know what to turn Gwen into.

I am tempted to turn her into a cockroach and have someone "accidently"squash her but it was pointed out to me that that isn't exactly following the formula.

What object can i turn her into that is both annoying, pretty much useless but somehow still needed occasionally?

Help me antigwenallies! You're my only hope!
  

Comments

[amythest-n-ice.livejournal.com]

a biro with no ink. Completely useless unless you want to pick your ears, stir your coffee or poke gross things!

[chester-kat.livejournal.com]

LOL!

That's a good one!

"If she's out of ink....what do you use her for?"

They stared at each other and frowned.

"She's handy for scratching all those hard to reach places?"

[amythest-n-ice.livejournal.com]

*g*

[jo02]

It might help our imaginations if you tell us what the others were turned into, unless that gives too much of the plot away.

Because all I could come up with was a toilet brush (cleaner).

Yeah . . . I really, really don't like Gwen.

[chester-kat.livejournal.com]

o_0

bwhahahahahaha! I can't believe i didn't think of that myself!

Owen = Scalpel (medical as well as a good metaphor)
Tosh = Laptop (obvious choice and lots of innuendo about hardware from owen)

There will be others but they don't really have names.That help? =)

[thi13enthghost.livejournal.com]

I second the toilet brush idea. That would be so deliciously evil.

[chester-kat.livejournal.com]

I might just have to use the toilet brush idea - if only i can be bothered to fight off the many Gwack fans that will try to lynch me.

*holds up a chair* Back you gwackers! BACK!

[jo02]

You can always make it a very nice toilet brush.

A nice shade of colour, a few strategically placed rhinestones . . .

cos honestly, my mind keeps drawing a blank on anything else, and I say that without trying to be mean.

[kellysaysrawrrx.livejournal.com]

ahahaha toilet brush! XD
i second that!

Gwen

[jennelldhalrbj.livejournal.com]

As a Vegan there are lots of things that I find totally useless--however, how about this---from an advert---

We're now all fortunate enough to live in a more or less smoke-free environment, but that doesn't necessarily mean everyone has managed to kick the weed. Well now thanks to some 21st century gadgetry, you can smoke without smoking. Mad as it sounds, someone has invented an electronic cigarette. It looks like a cigarette, it tastes like a cigarette, it smokes like a cigarette, but it isn't a cigarette, it contains no tobacco, and the "smoke" is just vapor. Containing state of the art micro-electronic technology this re-chargeable e-cigarette produces a real smoking experience without any of the deeply unpleasant side-effects of tobacco. As you inhale a tiny battery vaporises liquid inside the cigarette producing smoke. You can insert cartridges (it comes with a set of them) that will release nicotine - or of course choose to skip the nicotine altogether and just puff away on what is virtually nothing. Of course people may come finger-wagging at you telling to put it out (it looks that real), but there's nothing to put out. It's incredibly clever, and if you're bored of being unable to smoke anywhere then this little stroke of genius will be a godsend. It comes with a spare battery and a charger, and a full charge will last you for ages. No flame, no tobacco, no carcinogens, and unaffected by the smoking ban, this glowing "smoking" e-cigarette is considerably better for you than hacking away over the tobacco filled alternative, and will save you a fortune in the long run. A simply brilliant invention for those still slaves to the weed - and rather fun too.

Re: Gwen

[chester-kat.livejournal.com]

wow talk about utterly useless! lol

Thanks for the suggestion though and the info! =)

[holdingoff.livejournal.com]

a rubbish bin?

wait. that's too useful.

if you had her in the autopsy bay when she was turned she could be a colostomy bag. she is utterly full of sh*t.

[chester-kat.livejournal.com]

lol! Being a nurse i could really have fu with that idea....lol

[jo02]

Ooooooh - and I thought I was being bad suggesting a toilet brush.

But you are truly evil!

**steps back and salutes you**

[shamazipan.livejournal.com]

One of those keyrings that whistles back at you if you lose your keys?

[chester-kat.livejournal.com]

lol Cute.

"We keep trying to lose her but then she just whistles until we find her."

[vamp-lynette.livejournal.com]

A mop Ianto uses to clean up after Janet with? A bucket that he puts Myfanwys fish head dinner in?

[chester-kat.livejournal.com]

hmmmm, a bucket......I didn't even think about that....;)

[ceindreadh.livejournal.com]

I was going to suggest a chocolate teapot, but then chocolate of any description is always useful.
Although if somebody took a bite out of her, then when she'd get turned back, her brain could be missing. Naturally of course, nobody would notice ;-)

[astuta.livejournal.com]

A can opener? A shovel for the dinosaur poop? A brush to clean the toilet? Yes, Im evil, I know :D

[astuta.livejournal.com]

Ummm, it seems that the toilet brush idea was used. Really popular :D

[carma-chaos.livejournal.com]

Very late I know but I had to suggest it. How about those tiny boxes inside other boxes - full of the same thing over and over again, contains nothing but air becuase they're too small (useless) to put anything useful in and you can never seem to get them shut (to shut up).

Personally though the toilet brush sounds good.