"The Bad Taste of Gwen Cooper", crack, Andy and Rhys at a bar

[hohaiyee.livejournal.com]

Poor, poor Rhys, he's discovered that Gwen has cheated on him (again, like, how much does he know?), this time, especially because of WHAT he found in bed with her, it's Over. Good for Rhys, but he's still a bit traumatized by the horror, so he's having a pint with good old Andy at a pub. Andy is there because he's nice, and secretly, he felt sorry for Rhys for having endured so long the bullet he dodged!

Short and hopefully Sweet:



The Bad Taste of Gwen Cooper

Andy set his beer down onto the bar lightly, keeping his eyes on the bubbles and not at Rhys, keeping his laughter in, "if it help mates, I think you are a very handsome man."

Rhys rolled his eyes, and shook his fist comically at an imaginary foe, "Bird like that, somehow I've always knew she'll cheat on me, and part of me had accepted that-"

"-except you thought she had taste!" The laughter rises up now, curling Andy up over the bar.

"I mean, have you seen her boss! I might have understood if it was him, heck I've wou-", Andy laughs harder, "oh, come now, being straight doesn't make me blind!"

"Poor you", when Andy have recovered, he placed a solemn hand upon Rhy's shoulders, though the irrepressible smile still lit up his elvish face, "must have been a blow to your ego."

Rhys shrugged, still shuddering at the memory of what he walked in on, "I blame it on the aliens, her taste must have been damaged since she chose me!"

"I ran into him just before I left work," Andy supplied, "thought it was a domestic disturbance, but he insulted a bunch of a little old ladies at a diner, and I had to rescue him from their handbags and canes."

"Oh do tell!"

"It was the annual Sherlock Holmes late lunch at that diner, and the old ladies started out early. They've got into a debate over Watson being portrayed as stupid in film, while the ladies defended that Watson was supremely confident in the classics...and well, Mr.Davies made some female hormone joke, and the next thing you know, he found out how hard an eighty year old can kick!"

Rhys finished the bottom half of his second beer in a single gulp, "I know I ain't no movie star, but I can' believe Gwen had sex with a man who looks like a white Kim Jong II!"



ETA Author's Note: The punch line is from jo_dewni's It doesn't make sense, a Janto CoE fix it fic, major RTD bashing and some Gwen bashing.

Comments

[wanda1969.livejournal.com]

Kim Jong Il !!? Must be the hair and those snappy suits!
You seem to like Sherlock Holmes- that's twice I've seen you mention Watson now! And not a bad thing, I toyed with mentioning the Case of The Giant Rat of Sumatra in a story on here in Aug, but thought eveyone might think I was a fruitloop!!
Fun!

[jsks.livejournal.com]

the case of the giant rat was one of my favorites.

I need a veiled reference that's a good parallel

[hohaiyee.livejournal.com]

There was uproar a plenty when Doyle killed off Holmes, even Victoria wrote to him about it. Unlike RTD though, Doyle was a much better writer, in the context of the story it made sense, Holmes had always been reckless and at points, depressed. The way Holmes was brought back works as well (I think it was right that Holmes didn't tell Watson, it'd endangered him and wouldn't let him move on because Holmes didn't know how long he'll be gone).

Watson is unfortunately, viewed by some fans, SOME male fans who have the money to make the films, as being an idiot, even though keeping an idiot by his side also reflects badly on Holmes. Watson is a doctor, he was a soldier, and he's a writer! He's the sidekick, but he's a competent and valuable sidekick.

[jsks.livejournal.com]

i loved the last line.

Oink, someone else pointed it out first

[hohaiyee.livejournal.com]

It was a Janto CoE fix it fic, it started with Doctor Who arriving with Steven and Ianto being alive again, about the timeline being mixed up by this creature that looks like a white Kim John II.

The resemblance is uncanny eh! ...but I totally need to track down that fic.

Okay, credit to Jo-Dewni for the last line

[hohaiyee.livejournal.com]

Found it!

It doesn't make sense (http://jo-dewni.livejournal.com/3241.html), Janto CoE fix it fic, major RTD bashing and some Gwen bashing.

It's done

[hohaiyee.livejournal.com]

Seriously, the Gwen Sacred Cow thing makes my head hurts, we actually have a comm that's Janto free, torchwood_decaf, because Janto is so prevalent in fandom...why can't we have a comm that's Gwenfree, since RTD is explicit about turning Torchwood into Gwenwood.

So; heartless_tw

[wiseheart.livejournal.com]

You are delightfully evil!

[jpren678.livejournal.com]

HAHA!

Love it and specifically: "I know I ain't no movie star, but I can' believe Gwen had sex with a man who looks like a white Kim Jong II!"